Apr 17, 2008

An Ode to Error Messages, in 5-7-5

Monday morning, a friend E’d me with Haiku Error messages. For lovers of Haiku, and for those who despise losing data under any circumstance, these capture the essence of frustration and disbelief at this shortfall of the technology that (seemingly) runs our lives. (What would we do without email? Without the interwebs? OMG, [shudder/cringe] let’s not talk about it…)

 Here are the Haikus from this site:

Your file was so big.
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.

The Web site you seek
Cannot be located, but
Countless more exist.

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.

Program aborting:
Close all that you have worked on.
You ask far too much.

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.

Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.

First snow, then silence.
This thousand-dollar screen dies
So beautifully.

With searching comes loss
And the presence of absence:
“My Novel” not found.

The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao-until
You bring fresh toner.

Stay the patient course.
Of little worth is your ire.
The network is down.

A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone.

Three things are certain:
Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.

You step in the stream,
But the water has moved on.
This page is not here.

Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.

Having been erased,
The document you’re seeking
Must now be retyped.

Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.

Another Haiku-making contest was held on this blog: http://archive.salon.com/21st/chal/1998/02/10chal2.html